Edna’s birthday
by planet p
Summary: Story Repost! It’s Edna’s birthday. William/Edna


**Edna's birthday** by planet p

**Disclaimer** I don't own _the Pretender_ or any of its characters.

**Author's Notes** Story Repost! Written in 2008. Formerly, _Totally random_. Make of it what you will…

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"Where did it go?"

The little girl made a face. She knew he'd done something to make it go away.

The older girl who was sitting beside the younger girl grinned. She knew what was going to happen.

"There it is!" the man said, sighing, and produced a coin from behind the younger girl's ear. "But how did it get there?"

The little girl poked her tongue out. She didn't believe in magic. And he wasn't a real magician, in any case.

The older girl clapped.

The man smiled at her. "Do you know how it got there?" he asked.

The girl shook her head. "Uh-ah."

"A witch. A witch, Annie. She put a spell on it, and it disappeared right out of my hand, and reappeared behind Mel's ear."

Mel rolled her eyes. "Witches don't exist," she told the other girl matter-of-factly.

"Oh yes they do, young lady," the man told her.

"My ma's a witch," Annie said.

The man shook his head. Annie's mother was not a witch.

Annie made a face. "She is too a witch. Witch, witch, witch."

The man shrugged.

"And you know what I told her I want for my birthday?" Annie asked Mel with widening eyes.

Mel shook her head. She didn't know.

Annie giggled and whispered what she had asked for in Mel's ear.

Mel's eyes went wide.

The man crossed his arms. "What has she been saying to you, small child? Your eyes are as round as saucers."

Mel put a hand over her mouth. She wasn't saying.

Annie tossed her head. "I was just saying, how utterly fabulous it would be if ma had another baby!"

The man leapt out of his chair. "You what?" he cried.

Annie made big eyes.

The man shook his head. "That would be completely wrong!" he told Annie seriously. "Coercion! Black magic!"

"Voodoo?" Annie supplied.

The man snapped his fingers. That was it! "Voodoo!"

Mel had both her hands over her face now, trying not to laugh.

The man fell back into his chair and dropped his face into his hands.

The woman cackled behind his chair, startling him, and held up the lock of hair in one hand and the scissor in the other. "Now I have you entirely within my power!" the woman told him. "My minions, world domination is at hand! Ha-ha-ha!"

The man made a face. "World domination? What?"

The woman scuttled away without a reply.

"That was a little bit frightening actually," he said to the girls, perfectly fine again.

Annie snorted. "Frightening? Oh great wizard! I think not! Come dragon, come darkness, yet he shall not be afraid!"

The man glanced at Mel and then at Annie. "What are you saying? I'm terrified of dragons. Dragons are really, really frightening, and they- They burn everything! They're terrifying. They have no mercy."

"The world is doomed!" Annie declared.

The man sighed. "It is? Oh. I feel much better now. Maybe the world will end before the witch has a chance to take control."

The woman returned with a cake with four candles on it.

"What have you done with my wife?" the man asked as she was setting the cake down on the table.

The woman smiled and winked at him. "I put a spell on you," she breathed.

The man blinked. "Ah, wife! And… cake." He frowned, considering the cake for a moment, and then the woman.

"Stay still, husband," the woman said. "I am going to cut the cake."

The man nodded, and then he stared at the knife in the woman's hand.

The woman cackled again and cut the cake into eight pieces, and then she glanced at everyone in turn, and left to fetch plates. When she returned, she found three pieces of cake missing, and everyone but her holding one.

The man pointed at Annie, Annie pointed at the man, and Mel pointed at the man, who had on his most honest expression.

The woman crossed her arms for a moment, before slipping a plate into each child's lap, and serving herself a piece of cake on a plate and dropping back into a chair with a depressed sigh.

"Don't I get one of those?" the man asked, glancing at the plates.

The woman shot him a look. Yes, if he got up and got one himself.

The man reached across and took a plate, when the telephone rang, and he put his piece of cake down on the plate and put the plate on his chair, before hurrying away to attend the telephone.

The woman grinned and took a bite out of the man's piece of cake.

The two girls giggled. When they had finished their pieces of cake, they held out their plates and the woman served them up another piece.

The man returned and moved his plate from the chair to the table, then he turned back to the woman and said something to her in another language.

"I have to go to work," Annie translated wistfully. "Happy birthday." She paused, and added, "I love you."

The man turned and shot her a look. He hadn't said that.

Annie frowned innocently.

The man turned back to the woman and kissed her.

Mel squealed and giggled.

"You two make sure she behaves when I'm gone," the man said to the two girls, and pointed at the woman. "I don't want any dragon conjuring. The house is insured if it burns down accidentally, but I don't think the insurance agency is going to believe that dragons popped out of thin air and burnt the house to the ground in-?" He glanced at the woman.

She held up four fingers.

"In four seconds flat," the man continued. "Can I trust you?"

The two girls nodded with smiles on their faces.

"Very good," the man said, and turned and left.

Annie sat back on the couch. "Happy birthday, ma," she said to the woman.

The woman put on a big smile.

"Happy birthday, Edna," Mel said too.

"Thank you, honey," Edna cooed, smoothing the little girl's hair on one side of her head with a hand.

The little girl smiled.

Edna smiled again at her daughter.

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_Reviews?_

_Yeah, I thought it was funny… =(_


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